The Conundrum that is Life

My thoughts at the moment are about how we are shaped, almost molded, into the people we become. I often wonder about how different a person I could be, if circumstance had led me to it. Mostly these questions pertain to the broader question about nature v. nurture, that sort of thing. But if we really dig, sometimes what we see isn't what we would have liked. As much as it scares me, I feel I've spent most of my life with my mind virtually wholly embedded in illusions. My ideas of right and wrong, good and bad, etc. They all came from somewhere... be it anywhere in my environment. The funny thing is, I spent years trying to define myself as something separate from anything mainstream; what I failed to see for a long time, and I think most of us do, is that even the simple act of trying to stray from the pack indirectly defines you as part of yet another group. I would have been happy to evade societal labels all my life, except that I suddenly wondered-- if we run away for the sake of running away, is it still worth something? And what?

Maybe I'm opening up Pandora's infamous box for myself, but I feel this pressing urge to know. And if I can't know, be it whatever force of the universe trying to trick me, then at least to pursue the knowledge. I know I'm not the first.

At this point in time, I'm not sure how much worth exactly my life has...maybe yes, to specific individuals, but within the terms of space, and time, and the universe at large, and whatever else there is that we don't even know about, I have no clue how to assign any sort of currency to something like a single human life--regardless of who and what role they play within their community/country/ global society.

Which brings me back to my first question--if we had, as individuals, turned out to be polar opposites (if you can even imagine it) of what we are today, would it really matter? Once again, I can see some immediate, but probably, on a universal scale, trivial differences. We might have different relationships, lead different lives. How much does it really matter?

I'd like to think someday, I'll wake up in something mildly resembling the plot of The Matrix. However, I have some feeling...that if any sort of what we might consider 'enlightenment' were to take place, the truth might be something way freakier than anything we could imagine, or plot a movie from. In addition, as much as I would like to think this could happen, it's also this sort of blind belief that really drives me insane about the human race. So, I've managed to contradict myself. But, I'll take a wild guess that it matters not to anyone, and post it anyways.

My closing thought is that in all I know, I think there's a good chance I may know nothing. And I think the same of you as well.

Enigmatic Leader, or Cowardly Bully? : The truth about Rush Limbaugh

Rush Limbaugh. Call him what you want. He goes by many titles these days…. Unofficial face of the Republican party, Michael Steele’s probable cause of headache, conservative visionary, liberal archenemy…like I said, lots of things these days. Even to liberals, he’s something, cos everyone’s talking about him. Even me! Haha…
Really though, this guy is emerging as something. It’s on the tip of my tongue, but I can’t quite find the word. Personally, I think it’s more along the lines of emerging as a schmuck than any form of(or even slightly resembling, for that matter) leader. The first point I want to make is just the general schmuck sort of nature of this guy. All he does all day is sit around and criticize anyone he can. And then when he does something wrong or just generally shitty in character, right away he expects an apology!? Like he’s a friggin’ god? It’s like everyone who criticizes him has to apologize, but when he criticizes, that’s just alright. And when he does criticize, it often crosses the line from pure criticism to utter insult. For example, saying Michael J. Fox was ‘exaggerating’ the effects of Parkinson’s disease. I mean honestly, if you can’t find a real reason to criticize someone, you think reaching like that is going to make you popular? Ultimately, it was just a low blow and I think portrays well the true character of the Limbaugh. To go on, for a second point, he’s just not so smart. As Jon Stewart and then dozens of others rightfully pointed out, he misquoted the constitution at CPAC. He confused something from the Declaration of Independence with the constitution. And hey, that’s not so bad, anyone could do that. Except that if you’re speaking at a convention about it, you might just want to do some quick fact-checking. Just so you might not end up looking like an idiot. What I really want to point out though, is how much this guy and his message are in such discordance with American fundamentals. First off, just look at this guy. He appears to be physically, mentally, and emotionally unhealthy. But hey, there’s a lot of people fitting that description around. But anyone who would see him as a leader probably has some serious issues of their own. He also apparently lacks any sense of personal well-being or even survival, according to his declaration that he “hope[s] Obama fails”. I’m sorry, Mr. Limbaugh, but you make no sense. If Obama fails, according to your ideology, you, along with the rest of the U.S. population, would be killed by terrorists; but before you found death, you might get the chance to live on the streets, and maybe even starve to death before the terrorists kill you, because of a tanking economy.
What I would like to say before closure is that I’m not saying Rush Limbaugh is a loser because he criticizes people, or because he criticizes Obama and liberals, etc. I personally feel that dissent can be an important form of patriotism and citizenship. However, criticism for the sake of criticism is not. Because Rush chooses to take cheap shots at people, and because he criticizes people for standing up for their ideals (Obama) or for something out of their control (Fox), is what makes him scum. If Rush wants to criticize those in power for carrying out action based on their principles, then he is a hypocrite. The truth is he has no basis for his criticism; he is nothing but an overgrown bully, pushing others around because he’s too afraid to admit that he’s got problems of his own. So, congrats, Rush. On being the new, unofficial leader of the Republican party, and an incredibly egocentric tyrant. And to his Republican followers, I would like to remind you of 2 things: 1-(as some of you felt the need to remind liberals leading up to election 2008), remember that ‘Hitler was a good public speaker, too’; and 2-I’m sure that someone with talent and vision such as Limbaugh’s will surely help boost the popularity of your party for the 2012 election. Just keep telling yourself that…. To everyone else, good day.